Do you ever feel like you are just living in your head? My brain can be compared to a factory, working overtime twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week! Even when I am asleep, I find myself either dreaming about certain things that I want to accomplish/ forgot to do/ don’t want to forget or just plainly waking up in a panic! I met up with Kristina over a month ago. We were suppose to attend a fashion event here in Ottawa, but things didn’t quite work out as expected. Instead, we ended up grabbing a cup of coffee and catching up on life. We talked about how we are both experiencing similar feelings, and how it can be perceived as a sign of creativity!
It made sense, I mean I have so many ideas in my head and originally YouTube/blogging were meant to be a creative outlet for me; a way to express myself in a manner that I don’t get to in my day to day or at work. I have been thinking about this for a while now- told you I lived in my head. Frankly, I think that I am my own enemy. I hold myself back to the point that I let my perfectionism affect me in a negative way. If a blog post or video isn’t as perfect as I imagined, I will trash it. If the pictures aren’t as sharp as I planned, I will trash it. If the weather isn’t cooperating or an eye brow hair is out of place, well you guessed it. I have so many footage and pictures that are honestly just collecting dust on my hard drive. Oh Jesus, fix it!
Let me paint a picture for you. Kristina and I set up a date to take outfit pictures. You all should check out her blog btw, she is doing her THING. As I was running late – you know being at home and doing nothing takes so much of my time lol- I almost cancelled. Then, the sun went away and of course, so did my will to live LOL. All to say, I dragged myself out of the house and boy was I glad. We had a great time, and the pictures (featured in this post) turned out just fine.
Although I have a few videos that are ready to go/ blog posts that are ready to be posted, I want to put a stop to these sporadic uploads. I say that I am my own worst enemy, simply because I realize I have a million ideas that I never put into fruition. Additionally, when I do film a video or what have you, I tear it to shreds, claim that it isn’t good enough and never post it. As I was going through my hard drive to find pictures for this post, I stumbled across so many others that never made the cut. Yet, I go to sleep thinking about what I could have accomplished with them.
No more! I am deciding now to put a stop to this. I will go through my hard drive so don’t be surprise if you see pictures from years ago! I suppose it will be interesting as well to see how I did things back in the days. Being a content creator comes with a huge learning curve and it is constantly changing. That is the beauty of it.
All of that to say that I will be back, in full force on November 1st. I will be posting on the blog prior to that (hence this blog post), but in terms of youtube and Instagram, I will start posting consistently starting November. Hold me up to that, I have a lot coming your way!
Thank you for all the support over the years. I do not take it for granted!
[Photo Credit- Kristina]
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